From Dreams to Delusions
by mmok
Summary: Closing his eyes for a moment of bliss among too many, too many Ace's mind travels back in time and he thinks about a starry sky, an evening wind and the grin of an idiot. One-shot.


From his place among cold cement and dirt, body weakened by the sea water embedded in the shackles and binding him, _binding _him inside that cage of nothingness whereas only his breath could be felt, wounds open and blank eyes cast on the ground.

To think that before he was known as the fiery pirate Portgas D. Ace, it was almost laughable at his current state.

Closing his eyes for a moment of bliss among too many, _too many _Ace's mind travels back in time and he thinks about a starry sky, an evening wind and the grin of an idiot.

_"Hey Luffy. Let's be a little delusional." Ten years old Ace speaks to his brother._

_"Nah? What is de-luu-sional? Sounds like my name, shishishishi."_

_"Idiot. It means to think about impossible things."_

_"Oh. That's cool! Let's do that Ace!" Seven years old Lu pumps up his arms to the air, grin splitting his face as usual but Ace was already far too used to it to not call it normal._

_"'kay then. Hm... Let's see, what if there were other worlds outside our own?"_

_"Like there are two Ace's?" The little boy's eyes twinkled with childish excitement, somewhat also getting to Ace as he slightly blushes under his brother's stare._

_"Huh, maybe.-_

_"And another Sabo?" Little Ace's face turns down then, mouth opening in surprise and sadness, guilt and anger when thinking about their blond brother- gone brother._

_"Yeah... Definitely another Sabo."_

Portgas D. Ace smiles sadly at the memory, little Lu had tried to cheer him on when passed five minutes and he wouldn't speak a word. Because everything he felt Luffy knew in a way that no one knew. It made Ace feel scared and vulnerable under his brother's innocent gaze, exposed of his mistakes and a child trying to hide its uneaten vegetables in the corner of the plate.

Luffy had always known and will always know. The vegetables that Ace would hide, the others that he would swallow down his throat.

.

.

.

Time passes and Jimbe joins him.

Seeing his old friend for the first time in a long one, battled, beaten and tired glancing at him with closing eyes filled of surprise and relief, Ace knows his heart breaks a little because Jimbe is here because of the war, and there is a war because of _him_.

Sometimes all he tries in that blank space of nothingness is closing his eyes, trying to wake himself up mentally from that bad dream because his hands are too weak to even move.

-This is only a bad dream

-he thinks.

-And bad dreams are meant to end.

-it was what Lu said to him.

_Eleven years old Ace jolts awake in the middle of the night, body trembling and sweaty, eyes widened up as he tried to catch some breath._

_"Ace?" He hears little Lu right next to him, voice hesitant and concerned._

_"It's nothing Luffy. I got a bad dream."_

_"Oh." Thin arms circle his torso and normally, mostly because out of embarrassment Ace would snap those warm arms away but that night and that particular particular dream changed him ever so slightly._

_"I tried to save S-Sabo. I really did! I'm sorry Luffy." Even after a year his brother's name came out uncertain, a part deep inside of him that is still in denial because there is no way, really no way that strong Sabo got killed._

_"It was a dream Ace. A bad dream."_

_"But it was better than real. When it was real, I didn't even go save him." Those little hands squeeze their hold and Ace feels their weight._

_"Real is never good. A dream can be bad or good. Bad dreams always end, so Ace has just to dream about good things! Like saving Sabo!"_

_"For what? For what when he is already dead?" He feels the shake of the head buried to his back. It was weak and moist, but Ace didn't dare to mention Luffy's crying tendencies this time._

_"Cuz there are other Sabo's right? Then A-Ace can save them, and and then another Sabo would be h-happy and another Ace and me wouldn't have bad dreams."_

The Luffy of that time cried out those words through subtile hiccups, hands squeezing and trembling, Ace felt like a horrible person then, making Luffy sad like that. Making _their _little Lu sad like that.

"Thinking about your brother Ace-kun?"

"How did you know?"

The blue fishman's teeth are shown, sharp white teeth that expressed somehow the amusement of his old friend.

"You were smiling like Christmas had come earlier."

And indeed, Ace really enjoyed Christmas if not for the food then for the occasion.

.

.

.

"ACE!" His eyes blurred looked up to the source of the familiar voice and he saw. Luffy tired. So very tired, like he had aged a few decades all of suddenly.

Ace lets himself the luxury, the freedom to alter his mind a little and he sees Luffy grinning big at him, a straw hat too big for his own good with a grown-up blond in tow.

The crisped and bloodied and dirtied arms that catch him, that _for _him they fought are warm.

He can't help himself of smiling when he sees Luffy grinning and Ace ignores the tears, cries, pain, battles.

_"Ace! I'll become stronger! And stronger and stronger and stronger and the strongest!"_

"aCE! You wiLL n-not die damn it! damn-I'm so sorry. I'm s-soRrY!"

_"You promise that you will never die?"_

_"It's embarrassing you idiot!"_

"You promised! You promised! Ace please damnitwhatdoido you promised!"

_"Look after Luffy for me would you? I'll be going ahead of you two."_

**"ACE!"**

...

...

_"Hey Lu. Let's be a little delusional shall we?"_

In the midst of the flux of images Ace feels like floating. Weightless and towards a meaningless destination, forever trapped in his memories until the very moment it all ends. The pirate had thought of hearing Luffy crying for his name, then little Luffy grinning and then beaten Luffy again and Sabo and it's all kind of blurry really.

When Ace opens his eyes again, there is no Lu, no Sabo or gramps, only the salty smell of the sea and the calm singing of the waves and the blueness of a cloudless day.

He doesn't know where but maybe he has an idea. Somewhere very familiar to him, somewhere he-

-knows.

_"What if there were other worlds outside of our own?"_

_"And what if there was another Sabo?"_

_"Or another Ace?"_

_"Or Luffy?"_

_"Then we wouldn't even be here anymore."_

_"Ace! Meanie!"_

And he remembers the laughs, the pouty face and yelling Luffy, the starry sky, the evening wind and the grinning idiot.

Ace... laughs.

"Why are you laughing while sleeping you creep. You really gotta stop doing that."

A really familiar voice that he thought he may have forgotten calls him and Ace doesn't cry because it's _real_.

"Cuz I had a good dream you dumbass."

* * *

><p><strong>Disclaimer: One Piece belongs to its rightful owner.<strong>

**Thanks for reading.**


End file.
